Words I Live By.

Pay attention to your expectations, for they often hold clues about your deepest beliefs. If you “hope” that something good happens but you also worry that something bad will happen, you’re cancelling out one expectation with another. Try “knowing” that everything will work out for the best, regardless of any outer indications otherwise. Even though you really don’t “know” such a thing, CHOOSING to know will make it so!

#flowerdome #sg2014 #singapore

*wings from the heart



Crazy Conversations.

Maybe unusual.  Maybe crazy.  Or weird.  But I had these conversations this past week.  With this person.

She: Dang, how come you’re still alone?

Me:  What do you mean alone?  Of course, I am.  I live alone.

She:  I mean, are you not asking why no one’s here for you?  No one stayed?  No one decided to, you know, promised to take care of you.  Oh i know, they don’t find you worthy! (makes an evil wicked grin then laughs).  These men you’ve been with?  They think you’re not enough for them to surrender their singlehood.  

Me:  Can it not be that they are the wrong ones?  You know, that i have to meet the d-bags and the jerks first before I find the one?

She:  At your age? (Laughs). Should you have not known that when you were like younger?  It’s too late girl.

Me:  What do you mean late?  

She:  You’re past your prime.  Men now looks at you as an unhappy and grouchy single.  Even worst, there will only be two types who will “want” you ( she emphasizes the word want with her hands using the open close parenthesis sign)!

Me:  Of course not,  I maybe past my prime but I am not unhappy and grouchy!

She:  Whatever you say.  Think.  Two types – those single boys (those twenty-somethings whose testosterone are way up high) and those men who are either married but bored with their current state and wants some excitement – you being that (as she points at me) or separated.  Good if they are legally separated.  But those that are not, they also try their luck on you!  

Me:  That bad huh?  Just two types! Well, the twenty-somethings are good for the ego! (i laugh as she makes face).  I’d rather not mess with the twenty-somethings.  They only want fun and someone to fill their blank days.  And I’m not ready to be a cougar. No.  The bored husbands?  Hmm, they are still on that status so no to them too.  I’m not to settle.  

She:  Not to settle?  At your age?  Why would you not?  I bet you can’t even get a date nowadays?

Me:  Yep, i’m not to settle especially if at your own belief I am not good enough and only boys and the bored “wants” me.  Nah,  if such is the case, then I’ll just be single happy with a book on my couch. 

She:  So, you’ve given up huh?

Me:  Nope.  Remember the question in the movie, The Mexican?  When do you say enough is enough?  The answer is always never right? So never. I’ll just hope and wait some more.  I maybe jaded sometimes but I always manage to pull out from that dark pit of loneliness and desperation.  Hey, you are that?

She:  What do you mean I am that?

Me:  You are my loneliness and desperation!  I should, err..most appropriately, I must snap back.

She:  No, you always love me.  You’ve been welcoming me for days now.  So i’ll cling.

Me:  No.  Time for you to go.  Don’t bother me again with your negativity okay?  I am okay.  Sure, I am single and sometimes welcome you but I always kick you out.  You gonna leave now?

She:  I’ll come back when you least expect.  Don’t be too much comfortable on your couch okay?

Me:  Bye.

And then I leave the mirror.