You choose to forgive. You choose to love.
That’s what the answer Laida*’s mom gave her when she asked her how she forgave her husband’s infidelity and gave him a second chance. Of course, it took a lot of time, a lot of second guessing, a lot of relationship adjustments and a lot lot of trust.
I read from somewhere that one of the issues a person has to go through after a betrayal is to learn to trust again – by trusting not the other person but ONEself. Trust is not about how much you trust the other person to do what’s right or wrong but it is a function of how much you trust yourself to have the strength and the capacity to accept their imperfections. It is putting faith in yourself that you are courageous enough to put yourself on the line. And until you don’t muster this courage, then don’t even think making a move.
And time- right time. Who would go against saying that time heals wounds, broken relationships and hearts? That time tempers emotions? That it eases up anger, arguments and doubts? That most of the time, with patience, you have to let time unfold what’s there to see, to expect. To let time slowly build the trust required to be in a relationship again.
And just like the first phrase above, one chooses to forgive in order to trust again. Even if it takes a long time. Because you never give up on love and you always choose to love.
*Laida, the main female character of the local movie It takes A Man and a Woman.